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mamas day

the alchymista

last mothers day, koruna was sitting breech in my belly, stretching my body, my heart, and my imagination.

for months we knew koruna was breech. she tucked her head up under my ribcage and wouldn’t budge.  I chose to think of it as her desire to be near my heart and that helped (a very little bit) with my frustration. I had long envisioned koruna’s natural birth and her position seemed to alter that vision completely.  our midwives would not deliver a breech baby to a first-time mother and  no doctor in austin would do it either.  we researched the risks and truly believed that a natural birth was still our best option.

ian and I did everything we could think of to change koruna’s position.  I elevated my hips for 20 minutes 3 times a day. I did yoga, got regular chiropractic care (the webster technique for turning babies), acupuncture, moxa, mayan abdominal massage.  I went swimming at barton springs almost every day, turning flips and diving deep under water.  ian laid his head on my pelvis and sang to koruna, flashed lights at her,  read books to her.  we went in for 3 external versions (a procedure in which a doctor uses what seems like all of his or her might to turn the baby manually). and koruna didn’t move.  she was certain that she was where she wanted to be.

and so I tried to trust the unfathomable wisdom of my child and to find the poetry in surrender.   a week and a half before koruna was born, we were ecstatic to find in denton, texas an extraordinary doctor schooled in the art of breech birth.  koruna’s entry into this world was remarkable.  and there hasn’t been a dull moment since.

last mothers day I knew I had a daughter.  this mothers day I know she is koruna.